YAY, ME! Small victories...

Well, I got out of bed for at least 1/2 the day today.  Even did the dishes and mopped.  Was rewarded by finding my rose bush had bloomed today.  Middle of winter, and my roses are still blooming!  Gotta love that. Only thought about him 2 or 3 times today (ok, plus now makes 4)...  Going to try to just think "I wish you well" whenever he pops into my head and do something to keep me busy so that I don't think anymore.  Still not enough calories today to sustain metabolism and fat burn, but I did make myself eat 2 poached eggs and a glass of Almond milk.  After the game, I'm going to play Wii with my son.  Hoping to burn some calories there.

24-Day Challenge, of sorts....

With Christmas right around the corner, I can't afford to purchase products.  However, I wanted to start the 24-Day Challenge with the others.  So I decided to do a little experiment.  I am taking my 24 days and exercising at least 30 mins every day, eating the Dr. Oz slim down plan, and taking better care of myself.  I will see how much weight I lose that way, compared to the other girls who are using Advocare.  Then, next month, I'll do my real 24-Day Challenge (with products) and gauge the difference in weight loss no products vs. products.  Wish me luck!  Day 1 down and did pretty good....

Almost a year later... best get on the ball!

Okay, so not only have I NOT "found myself again", I entered into yet another relationship that took my self esteem even further into the crapper!  I seem to keep attaching myself to men who I need to "fix", who basically do not want to be fixed and would just like to use and abuse me...

So, then I cry when it's over.  I ask God "why me?"  Guess what?  The answer to that question stares me in the face every day and I haven't recognized it until now.  It's simple...  I try to fix others so I don't have to acknowledge the fact that I am broken myself.  Maybe if I work on myself and leave these yahoos (that's what my sis calls them  lol) alone, I'll gain my confidence back.  Then maybe I'll feel good enough to find a man who doesn't need my type of "glue" and who'll be my partner instead of my project.  Maybe...  we'll see.  ON TO YEAR 2....

A Bit Off Subject: Illegal Immigrants... go home!

Hello!  I know I have been letting you follow my weight loss and self-improvement journey for these past few months but I am talking about a different subject today for school.  My "big idea" is to help America's economy by what I call "Closing the Lid on the Great Melting Pot."  Although it is not politically correct to say so, I believe that all states should adopt the law that Arizona's governor recently enacted and make it a crime to be in the United States without proper documentation (i.e. American citizen, green card, political refugee, or a valid visa such as student visa, work visa, or tourist visa... valid as in NOT EXPIRED).  In my opinion, there are not enough jobs to go around these days.  Therefore, the jobs that are being occupied by illegal immigrants would be freed up and available to legitimate citizens if all illegal immigrants were sent back to their country of origin.  Not only that, but our government can not afford to pay for these peoples' healthcare.  I think that our national debt would decrease substantially if all illegal immigrants were deported.  The problem is, how do we find them all?  I also am of the opinion that the fact that these illegals are working, but not paying taxes is tantamount to stealing for the United States government and every American taxpayer.  I like that this is a blog setting because I get to rant without sounding non-academic!

rough day, food wise...

So I ran my ass off watching 3 kids and packing up my house, but I ate terrible stuff...

breakfast coffee, spark
lunch:  small piece of leftover lasagna
dinner:  salad with 5 pieces of popcorn chicken on top of it...

A 2-fer today...

Today I got a special treat... I saw two hummingbirds at the same time at my feeder and they were chasing each other around the yard.  It was really cool!

Breakfast was scoop of Spark, 2 cups coffee, 1/2 c. oatmeal w/homemade apple puree in it.
Lunch was a piece of watermelon
dinner was a very small piece of lasagna and a salad with balsamic vinegar on it.

Packed up my yard stuff and took it to the new place, so I definitely got my exercise in today and sweated til I could wring my shirt out!

good day today...

Although my ride flaked on me for the gym, AGAIN, I did ride my bike and walk.  For breakfast I had 3 egg whites w/fresh mushroom, onion and red pepper.  no lunch...  and for dinner I had 1 scoop (less than 1/2 c.) egg noodles, 3 oz. chicken breast and 1 cup steamed broccoli.  Lots of water, although less than a gallon throughout the day and 4 glasses of grape Spark.

I absolutely love going to the gym...

I have found that I love to go to the gym and workout.  I love to attend the Zumba classes also.  What I don't like is to exercise at home and, therefore, am not motivated to keep up my workout schedule even though I have tons of fun exercise stuff at home.

Unfortunately, I don't drive and have to rely on other people to get me to the gym...  Those people (of which there are only 2... one of which is also a member at my gym) either have their own lives to deal with or are not motivated into going to the gym as often as I would like to.

Conclusion....  I must try to get my driver's license!!

Day 2: Anytime Fitness...

Day 2: Anytime Fitness...
Please click title to view blog!

Ok, so here we go again... ANOTHER day 1:

Ok, so here we go again... ANOTHER day 1:
please click on title to view post... thank you!!

Starting 14-day MNSMax E from Trim line of Advocare:

Sorry, Bec, I'm starting a day early....  I am starting the e-pack supplements of the Trim line of Advocare today. I love the energy it gives me and I have so much housework to do that I am starting it today instead of tomorrow, with the rest of the group...  I only have 3 more days until my trip to Michigan.  I am looking forward to that.  I'll get to see my family for the 1st time in 4 years and, hopefully, will be bringing Billie back down here with me.  Getting my nails done tonight (another reason I'm starting the 14 day today instead of tomorrow... I need the energy to scrub my kitchen and bathroom BEFORE getting my nails done!).  Weight-loss speaking, haven't been doing very good at that, but inches lost (thanks to Catalyst) is still awesome!  Got measured at Curves last week and I had lost another 1/2 off my hips and another 1" off of my waist...  Wishing I could regulate WHERE I want the inches to come off though, because my hips are so much wider than my waist already that I still look very large even with 5" off hips (so far) and 3" off waist (so far)...  Becky, any suggestions??  Been doing Zumba off YouTube, as no transportation to classes.  Also the Supreme 90 day which is SUPER D-DUPER HARD!!!  Started my nutrition planning class, which is very interesting... can't wait to learn more...  Thinking about changing my major to Nutrition Sciences instead of IT.  I think it will come in handy more than the IT.

Real short because I'm tired

Just wanted to let you all know I started the Supreme 90 Day System today.  Workout was Chest & Back... very intense and I loved it!!!  Also, the diet that goes along with it is fabulous!

Added my weight ticker on today...

So, although I'm not at 0 lbs. lost, the ticker shows 0 lbs. of the 44 left to lose lost.  That's because I joined a fitness tracker site that it awesome.  Just another way for me to keep myself accountable so that I will continue moving forward in my weight loss journey.

Good news... but then a huge letdown yesterday

Good news first... ANOTHER 2 LBS GONE!!!  Now for the letdown... I was SO excited to be going to my first Zumba class last night.  Then I tried to call to confirm the time that the class was and the office at the community center is closed after 5pm.  So I couldn't confirm and therefore, couldn't go.  But today I called and found out for sure that the classes are every Thursday night from 6p-7p... so I will be going starting next week and the week after that, I'm gonna find somewhere that has it on a different night, possible 2 so that I can go at least 2-3 times per week!  Today I went and bought some super cute workout clothes.  Working out at home, it's okay to through on some sweatpants and an old T-shirt but if I'm gonna be out in public I've got to have the clothes.

Not enough...

So yesterday was "arms" day on my training schedule.  I did all of the exercises that I have gathered from fitness magazines and worked the arm exercises on my Tony Little Body Shaper, but my arms are not sore today.  I didn't do enough reps, apparently.  I can feel that I did something, but they're not sore.  I know that they should be sore in order to know that they got a good work out.  No pain, no gain right?!  Anyways, today is cardio.  Gonna do the Wii fit, ride my bike 4 miles, and Jillian Michaels Cardio Kick boxing.

Arms today...

Working my arms today...  Decided to work one area of my body daily, along with cardio every other day. I was looking in the mirror and decided that, even after weight loss, I look so flabby.  I haven't toned really, and that is essential. Zumba for the first time on Thursday.  I'm nervous about trying something new, but realize that it needs to be done.  Besides, I hear that Zumba is so fun that I can't resist!

OH YEAH! ADVOCARE IS HERE!!!

Awesome!  Got my shipment today, so I can look forward to tons of extra energy again!  I got some products that I hadn't tried before (Coffecino and Thermoplus).  I drank one of the Coffecinos as soon as I opened the package...  frickin' YUM!  The only way I can describe the taste is like those International Delights instant cappacinnos.  I drank it with ice, but it can be prepared hot as well (which I will be drinking in lieu of my coffee in the morning).... Going outside now to pick tons of tomatoes...  probably will be canning my first sauces and salsas of the year on Monday.

I am now selling the Advocare line of weight loss products:

I love and believe in these products so much that I've decided to become a distributor!  Follow the link to order products.  If you have any questions, find me on facebook or email me at parnold0623@live.com.

Down 2 lbs.!

YAY! I'm down 2 lbs.  Been active, although not formal exercise.  Yesterday, I scrubbed my kitchen floor on my hands and knees but instead of being on my hands and knees, I was doing squats as I was cleaning.  Wow, that must have been a sight!  I'm so glad no one was here to witness it, but my legs and butt were very sore afterwards.  As an added benefit, my floor looked great and my kitchen smelled so clean!  I used this spray oxyclean stuff and it really did the trick.  My floors have been yellowish ever since I moved in here but now they are almost white.  Still need more throw rugs though.  Landlord won't let me replace the vinyl.  Anyways, trying to stay on track, but it's really hard without my Advocare.  Can't wait till Wednesday, when I can order it.  Well, if I have the funds by then, which I think will be here Monday.

Catching you up on old news...

Well, as you know, I've been extremely busy with watching kids.  When I'm not watching them, I am doing my yardwork and gardening.  As such, I am in almost constant movement.  Ok, not a regimented or scheduled workout, but better than no exercise at all.  Next week, I get to purchase my Advocare and I'm going distributor so YAY ME!  Very excited about that.  So, to catch you up, basically my diet is the same every day... mainly because I don't have time to be diverse and this way, I know I'm eating right.

Breakfast:  Oatmeal w/blueberries and nuts
                  Coffee
                  Water
                   Green tea pills

Lunch:        MRS (but Kellogg's, not Advocare)
                  Water
                   Fruit
                   Veggie
                    Green tea pills

Dinner:       Grilled chicken on M-W-F
                  Grilled tilapia on T-TH-Sat-Sun
                   Water
                   Fruit
                   Veggie
                   Omegaplex

If I get hungry (normally I don't) between meals, my snack consists of soy nuts or almonds and more water.  I'm getting 10 oz. of water at a time, so with my meals and my bipolar meds and my seizure meds, plus snacks, I'm getting over the recommended 64 ozs.  Weight loss?  no loss, no gain.  That will change when I get my advocare, so I'm not worried about it.  My goal is still to lose my weight by Christmas, and I know that I can do that so I'm not worried at all.  Pretty soon I will have yummy fresh veggies from my garden to eat.  My tomatoes are turning yellow.... well on their way to red!  I've got about 2 days to go before I can harvest my first batch of peas!!  All is well.  If anyone has a good, low fat green tomato recipe, I would love that.  The only thing I have is fried green tomatoes and I'm not eating anything fried!!
                
                  

Not neglecting me, or you....

Still doing well, losing weight, and feeling good.  Just super busy and super tired at night.  Watching 2 small toddlers and a ten year old daily.  Will update everything tomorrow or next day at the latest.

Still on track...

Staying on track with the diet portion of my transformation.  Really wish I had my AdvoCare for energy though.  I keep busy with gardening and watching the baby keeps me hopping, but still not back to my set exercise schedule.  Have an appointment at Curves tonight at 6pm.  The dry erase board keeps my nutrition on track though.  Therefore, not losing but not gaining either.

BACK ON TRACK!

Although I won't have my Advocare products for a couple of weeks, I'm back on track with my weight loss.  I have to get up at 7am to be ready for the baby coming over, so that gets my day started earlier.  My exercise routine still isn't up to par, but I've added more protein into my diet and I do move constantly with the baby here.  When he's not here, I'm doing yard work and gardening.  As a result, I lost 4 lbs this week.  I'm at 161 though because I had gained 6 back from the yucky feeling days (Mother Nature helped).  If nothing else, I'm proud that I didn't let the bogged down feeling KEEP me down.  It could've been my bipolar cycling as well, so YAY that it didn't last weeks as it usually does.  At any rate, I'm back at it and happy.  I put a dry erase board on my fridge that has BREAKFAST: protein, oatmeal, fruit, water... Catalyst, exercise, water... LUNCH: protein, veggie, fruit, water...  DINNER: protein, veggie, fruit, water... Catalyst, exercise, water... SNACK: choice of nuts & berries OR Activia yogurt, water...  along with boxes for check marks, of course.  Not all of them are filled in (I don't cheat), but most are so I'm proud but need to do better.  And I get extra water when I'm outside in the yard, sweating out most of what I've already drank for the day.  I'm getting about 3-4 hours of yard work exercise per day.  My yard is looking spectacular.  Pics tomorrow.  

FYI...

Ok, those of you who know me already know this but here goes...  when I don't post on my blog, it usually means I am not doing well.  I'm either not focused or feeling blah.  This time it's been both.  I need to get back at it or all that hard work will have been for nothing.  On a brighter note, my garden is thriving!  Can't wait to eat all those yummy fruits and vegetables!  pics to come tomorrow.  It's 10:12am, and I'm supposed to be exercising as we speak.  Zaye is sleeping (the 10 month old baby I watch) so no excuses....  getting at it.  Thank you all for continued encouragement....  P.S.  WHEN I DON'T BLOG, PLZ SEND ME A KICK IN THE BUTT VIA FACEBOOK EMAIL!!!  Thanks for helping to keep me on track!

TOTALLY AWESOME!!!!!!

OH YEAH!!! THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT!!!I finally broke through the 160 barrier!  I am officially into the 150's and counting down!!!  Weighed myself today and I weighed in at 157 lbs.  In addition to the appointments I have set up for next week to check out some gyms, I also have a nutrition management class.  The lady at Curves said it's free there and that she doesn't think I'm eating enough, even though it's all healthy stuff.  She said, based on what I told her, I'm not getting enough protein and veggies.  She was also concerned that I've completely cut dairy out of my diet and wondered why.  To my knowledge, I thought dairy was totally fattening...  so I guess that nutrition class will do me some good.  We'll see. 


ON THE GARDENING FRONT:  My tomato plants have baby tomatoes on them already, as do my peas!  Tomorrow, my friend is bringing her kids (who I adore) over to put their hand prints on my garden fence and I bought cute butterflies to match also ...  (pics tomorrow... stay tuned!!).  I am planting my melons this weekend, probably tomorrow as well, providing I get to Lowe's for my dirt & such.  Picked up some flower seeds to put in little baskets (along with other goodies) to send to my little nieces for Easter.  Surprising their mothers (also my nieces, so I guess the little ones are great-nieces?) this year by passing down some of my treasured heirloom marigold seeds, that are from my grandmother's original plants.  They were passed down to me when I was 5 years old and I've harvested and sowed them every year since.  They were 50 years old when I was 5, so I guess that makes them 98 years old now!  God Love You, Grandma Stella.  I'm looking into getting them registered somewhere as "Stella" marigolds.  Unsure of how to do that though.  Have to do some checking with my National Gardening Club, of which I am a member.

Too tired to post, but....

Ok, it's 1am so this will be quick.  I have an appointment next Wednesday at both Curves in Haines City and Anytime Fitness.  The Curves has the Zumba Gold on Thursday nights and Anytime Fitness is open 24/7.  Wish me luck!

Same day, feeling better...

So I got my workout in today and I feel much better for it!  Plus, I did some yardwork and housecleaning so that helped.  Thanks Amanda and Becky for your posts and words of encouragement.  I value your opinions and you all keep me motivated daily!  Yeah, the schoolwork was definitely a do or die thing the past 3 days, but would not have been had I focused on getting it done gradually, daily, instead of trying to cram 4 assignments for each class (8 total) in 3 days time, when they are supposed to be done 1 each class per week!  My bad!  Anyways, you already know my breakfast/lunch today...  Dinner is Fuze Cranberry Slenderize drink, salad no dressing, my "mock" spaghetti but no sauce, and an apple...  "spaghetti" cooking as we speak!  Bummed that I am out of cucumbers as that sounds good tonight too.  Oh well!  Snack for later, while watching American Idol will be 3 Tbs. soynuts (my new fav snack).

Three days of forced laziness and my body is FEELING IT!!!

For the past 3 days, I've been forced to sit at my computer and catch up on my school work.  I knew that if I didn't, I would fail my courses.  I've had soooo much energy lately that I'm in near constant movement, which is good for my weight loss efforts but detrimental to my studies.  I simply could not get myself to sit down long enough to focus on my school work.  So I took Sunday, Monday and Tuesday and FORCED myself to stay put until my schoolwork was caught up.  Now, I feel so sluggish from not getting the exercise that I am used to that I feel right back at square one.  I'm going to have to find a way to incorporate the studies AND the exercise time. Unfortunately, that means changing my entire routine around which, with my bipolar, will upset my sense of stability.  So many setbacks in life... UGH!  So, here it is 3pm and I was up until 4 am doing my schoolwork and I feel DRAINED, mentally and physically.  My "breakfast" wasn't even until 2 pm, but it did consist of hb egg, chicken breast and avacodo mix, and a small clementine... so I am considering that both Lunch and Breakfast.  At 4 pm I will incorporate what I hope to be a regular workout time.  Here's my thoughts on the schedule:

8am -- Breakfast and pills
8:30a- Housework (cuz I can't function if my house is dirty)
10am-First workout of the day, 30 minutes Wii Active
11am-schoolwork
1  pm-Lunch (or snack depending on hunger level) and pills
2-4pm-gardening/yardwork
4 pm-2nd workout of the day, 30 minutes Wii Your Shape by Jenny McCarthy and/or weight training
5:30p-Dinner and pills
6-6:30p-Bike ride (weather permitting)
6:30-7p-work on crochet/knitting projects
7-8pm-more schoolwork
8pm--Bedtime, and evening pills which I would then be asleep by 10pm

For those of you that know me, I HAVE to be regimented or nothing gets done.  For those of you who don't know me, now you know.  Becky, please check over this and let me know if I need to have this schedule for M-W-F and incorporate a different workout schedule for muscle confusion on the off days.  Sunday will be my only "lazy" day.

LAST DAY OF THE 24 DAY CHALLENGE:

Still feeling absolutely great.  Not as much actual WEIGHT loss, numbers-wise I only lost 8 lbs.  BUT inches lost is a whole other story.  I lost a total of 18 inches overall from my body, mostly in the thighs, hips, and waist which is where I needed it the most.  So, all in all, I am very pleased with my results.  I'm going to continue taking the Catalyst, Zzz, reintroduce the Omega Complex, finish the meal replacements, the Spark, Oasis, my green tea pills (not advoCare), and continue on my exercise circuit for a month.  Then I'm going to do the 24-day challenge again.

Oh, ouch! I want to lose weight in my butt, not have it CHEWED off....

Well, I just got my butt chewed out by a personal trainer for taking AdvoCare!  She says to plan on spending $$ for the rest of my life if I am going to rely on that.  WELL...  here's how I see it:

A.  I don't rely on it, it is a boost.

B.  a PERSONAL TRAINER costs upward of $15-20/hour,  MY personal trainer on my Wii Active is free and kicks my butt just as hard.  Junk food and cigarettes (which I no longer buy ANY of) costs a bundle.  So I'm actually saving money.

C.  I workout just as hard as anyone who is NOT taking supplements
                           and
D.  My sedentary lifestyle is now VERY ACTIVE... so HOORAY FOR ME...

E.  and most importantly....  IT'S MY MONEY!!!!!!

AND THANK YOU ADVOCARE FOR GIVING ME THE PUSH I NEEDED!!!!!!

3 days left of the challenge:

I'm on day 21 of the 24 day, so I guess including today is 4 days left.  Still feeling absolutely fantastic!  I've noticed the scale being stuck at 160 for the past week.  Hoping it goes down next week, but for now the clothes are still fight better, I have way more energy, and my measurements are also going down.  Did measurements this week, along with weighing.   Here are the results:

3/24/11
R. ankle 9  L. 9
R. calf  13  L. 13 3/4
R. knee 15 1/2 L. 15 1/4
R. thigh 22 3/4  L. 22 1/4
hips 42
waist 32 3/4
bust 37
R. upper arm 12 3/4  L 12 3/4 (hey, they match YAY!)
R. L. arm 8 3/4  L 9
neck 12 1/4

3/19/11 (JUST 5 DAYS AGO!!)
R. ankle 9 1/4  -1/4  L. 9  stayed the same
R. calf 13 3/4 -1/4  L. 13 3/4 stayed the same
R. knee 15 +1/2 (that's odd)  L. 15 + 1/4
R. thigh 25 -2 1/4  L. 25 1/4 -3 (I KNEW it, I can see a big diff in my thighs)
(note for above...  probably from all the squats on the 30 day Wii challenge)
hips 43 -1
waist 36 -3 1/4
bust 37  stayed the same (thank God.  Don't want to lose that)
R. upper arm  13 7/8 -1 1/8  L. 13 5/8 -1 1/4
R. lower arm  9 -1/4  L. 9 stayed the same
neck 12 1/2 -1/4
GRAND TOTAL OF OVERALL INCHES LOST: -9 3/4" 


ABSOLUTELY AMAZING.....  that was only in 5 DAYS!!!  I wish I would have taken my measurements right BEFORE the 24 day challenge!!  But I didn't think of it.  So, it's been 30 minutes and I'm going to drink my "Almond Joy" (for those of you who haven't been following, that's my advoCare chocolate meal replacement and 1/4 tsp. of almond extract!)

Zzz kicking in now, so this will be quick...

Still feeling great!  My scale isn't showing #'s going down, but my energy level is still through the roof and my clothes are fitting better.  Real quick:  Breakfast=meal replacement shake, and grapes
                                                         Lunch=strawberries, lettuce, tomato (3 grape size) no dressing
                                                         Snack=trail mix
                                                         Dinner=1 chicken breast (boneless, skinless) cooked on the grill,
                                                                     stouffer's spinach souffle (however you spell it) cooked in microwave.
I'll post more tomorrow, before I fall asleep right at this computer.  Gotta love the Zzzz......

What a fabulous night and day!

Hannah-banana and Noah-bologna spent the night last night.  We played Wii for HOURS and made some bracelets and key chains, then watched a movie until they fell asleep.  This morning, I let them plant some hummingbird flower mixture seeds in a pot for their mommy, and some plastic starter pots that I had laying around.  Then we played more Wii.  I definitely got my exercise today.  Tomorrow is 3 miles on my bike, along with my Wii Active 30 day challenge and my Flexbelt.  Breakfast today was my "Almond Joy" meal replacement drink and grapes.  Then I got real busy with the kids all day and kinda skipped lunch.  Snack was a mixture of sunflower kernels, pumpkin seeds, dried cranberries and almonds.  Dinner was salad with cherry tomatoes, hard boiled egg, onions, and diced avocado.  Got to get on seminar, but I'll be back tomorrow, of course!!!.....

Wish it were tomorrow already!!!

I can't wait for tomorrow to come...  For one thing, I picked up my almond extract today at the store so when I make my chocolate meal replacement in the morning, I'll put about 1/4 tsp of that in it and it tastes just like an Almond Joy candy bar with none of the guilt!!!  yummy!!  Plus, my friend's kids are over spending the night and we are going to garden tomorrow.  Tonight, we are going to play Wii.

Measurements today!

Ok, so these measurements are going to sound HUGE to most of you, but I'm happy about them and I'll tell you why at the end....

3/19/11:


R. ankle:  9.25"  L. ankle:  9" ?? odd
R calf:  13.75"  L. calf:  13.75"
R thigh: 25"  L. thigh:  25.25  ??  odd again ??
hips:  43
waist:  36
bust:  37
r. upper arm:  13 7/8"  L. upper arm:  13 5/8"  it's just me or anyone else see L/R halves not matching???
R. lower arm 9  L lower arm: 9
Neck:  12.5
weight:  161

OKAY, THAT'S YUCKY...  BUT NOW FOR THE GOOD PART:

1202/10:


R. ankle: 10"  L. ankle: 10.25"
R. calf: 14"  L calf:  14"  (hmmm... it was the same then???)
R. thigh:  25.25" L. thigh:  25.25"
hips:  45"
waist:  40"
bust: 38"
R. upper arm:  14  L. upper arm:  14.25
R. lower arm:  9 L. lower arm:  9  no change there for either one
Neck:  13
weight: 180

So, as you see...  even though I have a really long way to go, I have lost 8.9" and 20 lbs. overall!!  I am very happy about that.    Now for the goal measurements:

GOAL MEASUREMENTS:


R. ankle:  7" and same on the left
R. calf:  9" and same on the left
R. thigh:  20 and same on the left
Hips:  34
waist:  26
bust: 36
R. bicep:  10 and same for the left
R. lower arm: 8 and same for the left
neck: 10
weight:  between 115 (first goal)  110 (ultimate goal)

MY VOW TO MYSELF IS THAT I WILL ACCOMPLISH THESE GOALS NO MATTER HOW LONG IT TAKES:  PLEASE!!! CLICK TO FOLLOW ME TO HELP ENCOURAGE ME ALONG THE WAY!!!!!!!!  I NEED ALL THE MORAL SUPPORT I CAN GET!!!

Very quick post....

I am extremely tired right now.  I have been running since 8 am yesterday morning, as well as doing schoolwork.  So, long story short....3/17:  BREAKFAST:  meal replacement shake, Spark, strawberries
                                            LUNCH:  Spark (heated, yummy!), melon balls, almond/sunflower seed mix.
                                            DINNER: Cod packet-cooked on the grill with pineapple sage leafs, asparagus,
                                                             and salad.

                                  3/18:  BREAKFAST:  Spark (heated), hard boiled egg,
                                            LUNCH:  Spark, Meal Replacement (chocolate)
                                            DINNER:  lean pork roast cooked out on the grill (2 oz.), "Mock" spaghetti (my                                                           own recipe that is made with spaghetti squash for the "noodles" and the sauce is fresh tomato, basil, minced garlic, minced onions, and 1 tbls. olive oil pureed together in a food processor).  Very, very healthy!


                                  

just LOOK at the difference a year 1/2 and being unhappy does to a body....

Although I was by no means thin or healthy, this pic (with my friend's baby) is me at 145 lbs.  This was 2 years ago (nearly).  Then I got back with Jeff and was miserably back with him for a year.  The pic with the red shirt is me now (even AFTER losing weight recently).  Just goes to show you what life can do to you if you let it....  I'm very upset with myself for letting myself go!

AND EVEN MORE UPSET WITH HIM FOR ONCE AGAIN MAKING PROMISES HE NEVER INTENDED TO KEEP!!!!!

Just as I feared....

So days 12 and 13 went smoothly.  However, as I had feared, I am NOT losing the pound/day as I was during the cleanse.  Rather than letting this discourage me, I am switching to weekly weighing instead of daily.  As my good friend and advoCare advisor, Becky Edwards, pointed out it took years to gain the weight and it's not going to come off overnight.  It will, however, come off in weeks rather than years!!!  Thank you, Becky, for keeping me motivated and on track!!!

Tuesday~Day 11....

Ok, so in addition to the regular exercise I've been getting (walking, biking, Wii, gardening, Flexbelt), I did "baby leg lifts" like I used to when my boys were babies.  For those of you who do not know what that is, I lay down on the floor, put my knees to my chest, put the baby (8 mos old and weighs approx. 15 lbs.) on my shins.  Then, hanging onto the baby of course, I lift my shins up and down, bending at the knees.  The baby has a BALL (laughing the whole time) and I get a great work out!  Then, I did "baby bounces" with the baby.  THAT one is when I sit on the edge of the couch, sit the baby on my knees and bounce my legs up and down, like a pony.  Another fun time for baby and workout for me.  With that one, it's important to keep your toes on the ground and bounce with your feet to lift the weight.  It works not only the thigh muscles, but also the calf muscles. I also added the resistance band to my nightly routine to work my arm muscles more.  That "before/during" pic that I posted the other day freaked me out!  I'm still a lot heavier than I even realized.  Breakfast today was an apple and a hard boiled egg, with my during pills.  I took the pre-pills 30 mins prior to eating.  I had an Oasis as well.  Lunch was 1 celery stick w/guac, 2 small (about 2 oz. total) b/s boiled chicken tenders no breading/sauce. For dinner, I had 1 turkey burger cooked on the grill with no bread/roll or sauce, steamed broccoli, and 2 slices of dried mango.  During these 14 days of the program, I will be taking pre-meal pills 30 mins prior to Breakfast and Lunch as well as during-meal pills WITH breakfast and lunch...  that will be consist daily so I will not repost each time on that.  Each evening will be the Zzz and with each dinner will be the 4 (not six because I get 2 during the day) of the Omega-3's.  I've bought a dry-erase board for on my fridge to check off each time I take them, so I can't forget.  Water, of course, remains at 64-80 ozs. daily by itself with additional water used for the Spark and Oasis drinks.

As promised, my pink rose bush already in bloom.....

'Til tomorrow then......

Last day of the cleanse.... Day 10

I'm a little nervous, as today is the last day of the cleanse process of my 24-day challenge.  The reason I am nervous is because starting tomorrow, my system will no longer be flushing itself out.  I am starting Day 11, with pre-meal pills, during meal pills, and still taking the Omega-3's at evening.  I am also still going to be taking the Catalyst.  I have been steadily losing a pound/day and I don't want that to stop.  I plan to increase my exercise even further to make sure that my weight loss stays steady.  I am starting to look a lot better, and I FEEL tremendous!!  The energy level feels like I did when I was in my early 20's, and that is saying a lot, because I am 43!!!  Today's breakfast consisted of melon balls, an apple, and an egg white.  Lunch was a piece of celery with my homemade guacamole on it and 3 tbs. of dried fruit w/pumpkin seeds.  Dinner consisted of 4 oz. of b/s chicken breast and steamed broccoli.  Snack was 18 grapes.  I have also been taking Zzz every night 60 mins. before bedtime and I am consistently getting between 8-10 hours of sleep!  Advocare and Becky are quickly becoming indispensable to me!!!!  On the gardening front, my cucumbers (both the climbers and the bush ones) are starting to pop through the soil, as well as the peas and 2 of my tomato varieties.  I picked my first ripe strawberries today.  Those are part of my breakfast tomorrow!!  Nothing like garden fresh fruit!  Tomorrow's post will include a picture of my rose bush (the pink one has SEVERAL roses on it~gorgeous!)....

Past bedtime, but quick post

Very proud of myself.  Walked 4 and 1/2 miles today through town and beyond.  Terrain was varied and it was up and down hills.  I was exhausted and exhilarated all at the same time once I got home!  For lunch I had celery sticks with my homemade, very healthy guacamole, and melon balls.  For dinner, I had boiled chicken breast and boiled sweet potato and two more celery sticks.  For snack, 15 almonds, 1 tbs. dried berries, and 2 slices dried mango.  Good night all, very tired tonight.

So, yuck... "before" picture....

Had a huge letdown yesterday in my personal life, but I'm not letting that stop me from continuing to be motivated.  Oasis to the rescue, yet again!  Love that stuff!!  Down another pound.  Here's a "before" pic that is kinda actually a "during" pic because at the end of December, my stomach stuck out past my boobs!  Gotta laugh at myself, or I'll cry!  Still SOOOOOO much to do to get where I want to be.  Gotta work more on those arms too.  Been concentrating on the stomach/lower body areas....

Oops... missed posting for 3 days

Sorry, all...  but to get you up to speed, still steadily losing weight.  I went up .8 lbs yesterday because mother nature came calling.  Which, usually at that time of the month, I gain anywhere from 3 to 5 lbs without fail.  This time was only an eighth of a lb so I'm pretty happy about that.  Then today, not only is that .8 lb gone, but also another lb.  Almost down into the 150's now!!  So happy.  Energy level still through the roof!  Stopped drinking coffee because I don't need the caffeine with all of the energy I have, but I love the taste of it, so I bought some decaf instead.  I don't put any creamer in it and use 1/2 pkt of Truvia.  I put on a size 9 pants yesterday!  They fit and zipped up, but after about 1/2 hour felt too constricting.  Next week, I'll be wearing that size.  I'll stick with the 10/11 for now.  Size 12 and size 14's got put away as I had to keep pulling them up and it was uncomfortable!!!  YAY, ME!!!  Anyways, Day 5 - 7 consisted of all of the advocare products I'm supposed to have along with tons of water, fruit (melon balls, watermelon, apples, strawberries, and mandarin oranges), Spark, Oasis, salad, 1 chicken breast per day grilled on the grill outside using mesquite charcoal and seasonings, steamed vegetables, and for snacks a handful of nuts and dried berries.  Breakfast yesterday consisted of oatmeal with almonds and a tsp. of flaxseed in it.  I've been trying to take flaxseed once/day also.  Breakfast today (Day 8) consists of fiber drink, V-16 (which taste almost identical to Sunny D to me), and 30 mins later, oatmeal with blueberries mixed in.  Will post more later.  Going to try to post at night time, like I was but will go back to daily posting as it's too hard for you all to distinguish what was eaten/supplements taken, etc. when it's all blogged into one post.  Til later then....

Day 4~Monday..... also day 4 of no smoking :)

Loads of energy still.  Last night was a bad night due to unwanted phone calls in the middle of the night, but thanks to Oasis from Advocare, the stress and tired feelings went away.  Did 3 hours of gardening today, putting in my rose garden and fencing.  Breakfast was Oasis and Spark and oatmeal with dried berries and almonds in it.  Lunch was a cucumber, some almonds, and a hard boiled egg for protein.  Dinner consisted of tilapia cooked on the grill using hickory charcoal~yummy, steamed peas, and romaine lettuce with balsamic vinegar on the side.  I took my 5 omegaplex at dinner time and my 3 fiber pills 30 mins. before breakfast.  Feeling great!!!!  I am NEVER hungry! But I do force myself to eat or the 24 day challenge is not going to work the way it is supposed to.  Need the calories for my metabolism to get--and then stay--in gear.  Trying my Flexbelt for the first time tonight, as it arrived in the mail today.  I'll tell you how my abs feel tomorrow.

Bringing you all up to date.... Days 2 and 3 of 24 day challenge

I missed posting for the last 2 days.  Doing, and feeling, absolutely fabulous on the 24 day challenge.  The energy level I have feels like I'm a teenager again.  I found out through my friend and advocare advisor that I was doing part of the program wrong.  I was taking the pre-meal pills and those don't start until the 11th day.  Thank you for catching that so quickly, Becky!!!!  Also, I needed to be taking 4-6 of the Omegaplex with dinner.  So all is corrected now.  For the past 2 days, B-L-D has pretty much been the same so I'll condense.  Breakfast=fiber drink, fresh fruit consisting of melon balls, apple, and canteloupe, advocare Oasis drink~yummy blueberry flavor.  Lunch=trail mix, dried berries, hard boiled egg, advocare Spark (fruit punch flavor).  Dinner=steamed peas, dried apricot, romaine lettuce w/tomatoes, and chicken breast. And water, water, water, water,.... all throughout the day.  Day 2 I babysat for a 10, 5, 8 month, and 2 month all at the same time and cleaned the house while I was doing that.  Then I came home and gardened, which included mulching and laying soil beds, so heavy lifting. Day 3, I walked a mile and rode my bike a mile, gardened some more.  Still waiting for my Flexbelt to get here.  Should be any day.  Today's fish day as I am going to strive for fish or tuna 3 times per week.

Since weight loss journey began, STATS SO FAR:    Down 19 lbs. and 2 pant sizes.

Since advocare 24 day started:  STATS SO FAR:  Down 2 1/2 lbs. in 3 days!!!  Energy level thru the roof!!!!!

3/4~24 Day Challenge Begins:

Day one of my 24 day challenge (Advocare)  Starting weight 164 lbs. 8:00am: For breakfast, I took my pre-meal pills 30 mins. b/4 eating (I will be doing this throughout so I won't repeat).  Then I had fresh fruit consisting of 5 strawberries, 1/8 of a honeydew melon, and a cup of watermelon and a fiber drink, along with the "during meal" pills.  Also, 16 ozs. of water.  I didn't even BEGIN to get hungry until 2pm, so: Lunch was advocare meal replacement shake (chocolate) and 16 oz. of water, along with my pills.  It is now 5:44pm and I am not feeling the slightest bit hungry so I'll wait til 6:30 to have dinner which will be:  salad w/tomatoes, onions, cucumbers and balsamic vinegar; chicken breast cooked out on the grill using seasoning only, no sauces or oils; and steamed broccoli.  I KNOW that I am not getting nearly enough calories, but I am seriously not even the slightest bit hungry and I have so much energy right now!!!  I'll also be consuming about a gallon of water per day so I'm not going to list that with each meal either.  Suffice it to say that I will be drinking NOTHING but water unless it's a meal replacement drink.  Still waiting on my Flexbelt to get here.  Would have thought it'd be here by now but neither is my yarn that I ordered the same day so, possibly tomorrow.  Got the rest of the stuff for my gardening.... pink Mandevilla, pink roses, white marble to put around my baby trees, rose gardening soil, topsoil for the vegetable garden, white fencing for along the flower beds and solar lights to put up the walkway.  Needless to say, I have my work cut out for me tomorrow.  But gardening is such a joy to me that "work" is not the right word for it!  'Til tomorrow then......

OK, NOW I'M ARMED AND READY......

Wii Fit... check
Advocare 24 day challenge... check
Flexbelt for abs.... check
Bike.... check
iPod Shuffle... check
Motivation.... check
Happy.... YOU BET!

I am sooo BEYOND motivated now!!!  I can't wait to get bikini beach body ready!!!  Told you 2011 was my year!!!  LOVING LIFE TO THE FULLEST RIGHT NOW!!!!

15 down and counting.....

Wow!  I have lost 15 lbs. since the first of January!  So excited!  Can't wait until I am able to get my Advocare 24 day program!  Right now I am taking that Mega T Green Tea supplements and I can literally FEEL myself getting thinner every day...  it's awesome.  As for diet, yesterday for breakfast I had a yogurt, coffee, and my T.  For lunch I had a salad, water and my T.  For dinner I had boneless, skinless chicken breast cooked on the grill and watermelon.  For exercise, I did some bicep curls, tricep curls, leg lifts, walking, and taking care of an 8 month old baby for 3 hours.  I've started tracking my fitness and nutrition on SparkPeople.com.  It's a free fitness and nutrition site that I adore!  I didn't know until yesterday that I could connect it with my Facebook (thank you, Becky, for letting me know).  GREAT NEWS on the nature front......   I've finally started getting some birds eating at my feeder!!!  No hummingbirds yet, but I'm still praying for them, and both of my hummingbird feeders are bright red so it's only a matter of time.  Ok, so til tomorrow then.....

Loving my life right about now...

Now that I am getting "back to myself", I am really loving life!  The weather has been very cooperative, and so I have planted all of my marigold seeds, as well as some pansies and violas.  My morning glories are about an inch high.  As for my diet, today I had Special K cereal w/banana and ff milk.  For lunch, I had New York strip steak (1/4 of a whole one) on a whole wheat bun.  Loads and Loads of water.  And with both meals I took 1 Mega T green tea capsule.  My scale is still not working, despite replacing the battery so I don't know for sure how much weight I've lost, but I can see it and feel it.  It got too late for dinner, and I was not hungry anyways so I didn't have any.  Til tomorrow then....

Another beautiful day!

Yesterday, I spent all day outside planting my new flowers and doing yard work.  Very good for the arm and leg muscles.  Lots of water all day. For breakfast I had Special K w/ff milk.  No lunch.  For dinner I had a salad with chicken and grape tomatoes on it, very little dressing.  And that was it for the day.  Today, I started taking Mega T green tea dietary supplements.  A friend of mine lost 20 lbs in one month on them, without changing her diet or exercise habits much.  I am going to be taking them IN ADDITION to changing my daily exercise habits, so we'll see what will happen.  I bought hand weights yesterday and worked out my biceps and triceps quite a bit.  I did 100 (on each side) leg lifts... thigh muscles were screaming!  Of course, I had to do them 25 at a time, with about a minute pause in between the 4 sets.  Also did 25 (core very weak still so unable to do more than that) front leg lifts, that works out the lower abdomen and the core muscles.  At the end of the month, when I have the money, I will be buying an exercise ball (replacing my office chair with that for extra workout, even while I sit), Perfect Sit-up Machine (saw that at Walmart), an elliptical machine, Advocare 24-day program, and the Zumba Body Transformation series.  I am serious about getting this weight off of me.  Oh yeah, and a bike to ride outside.  Also, those tennis shoes that tone while you walk.  Find out that I have lost 10 lbs. since leaving my ex, so that would be since the 2nd week of January... about a month, or a little over a month.  Feeling extremely motivated.  To top of the day yesterday, I got a phone call from a very dear friend, whom I miss very much.  Life is good.......

Still sick....

Still sick today, although feeling a little better.  Watched Biggest Loser last night and felt horrible about being lazy lately, and then knowing I could do nothing about it because of how sick I am.  Back at it tomorrow.  As for diet, the only thing I've had in the past 2 days is a couple packs of Ramen noodles, as soup was all I could stomach.

Sick lately....

Been sick with flu lately.  Body aches (and not the good kind from exercise, but the bad kind from flu)... Thought I'd check in, but now I'm going back to bed.  Gonna have Jillian Michaels kick this crap out of me tomorrow whether it's gone or not!

Here she is...

Haven't written in a week...

Hello, I'm back!  Literally, but not figuratively (meaning my figure!).  I have the "old me" back, as far as my attitude and personality.  Now I just need to shed this extra person that has settled herself over top of my real body.  I sound like I'm talking about a pod person or something, I know, but that's really what it feels like.  So, the remainder of my blogs will consist of holding myself accountable for the calories I take in and the calories that I expend.  Of course, there will be some gardening tidbits along the way!  I'll be writing again tonight, tallying the day's totals.

Well, darn it....

Good thing I'm not all that hungry today, because I'm eating my words!!  Steelers lost :(   Good game, Packers.  Hung outside, waiting to see some hummingbirds at my feeder, but they aren't around yet.  So, I'll hang out there again tomorrow, waiting and hoping.  Oh, and I lost 2 more lbs.  YAY, me!

GO STEELERS!!!

No time to write today.  Steelers are about to win the Super Bowl (again).  Please don't make me eat my words, Steelers!!!!  lol.....

Ok hummingbirds, now you can eat....

Very excited today as I put my hummingbird feeder out.  I was having my morning coffee, patiently awaiting the arrival of my new "guests" when the rain that God has been promising us for the last three days finally arrived.  My morning glories have started to emerge from the ground around the tree.  They will be an extra treat for the hummingbirds when they are in full bloom.  I expect they'll grow all the way up the tree, just like they did last year.  The hummingbirds love to suck the nectar from morning glory blooms.  I think this year, I'll put in one of those mist spraying bird baths also.  Was able to wake up earlier..... 8 am to be exact! YAY, me!  So, in honor of the new hummingbird feeder, I leave you with this image......

Ok, bump in the road notwithstanding... back on track

Rough night last night, as all who are keeping up with my blog already know.  But, today is a new day and I'm facing it with a smile!  I worked out in the garden area today.  Can't call it a garden yet, as it is just in the planning and building stages.  I've got the newspaper laid out to kill the grass and weeds, right where I want my vegetables to grow.  Later on tonight I'll be going to Walmart and buying my topsoil and additives to throw on top of that.  Muscles are definitely feeling the burn from moving all of the bricks that I used to hold the newspaper down, as well as pushing the wheelbarrow around and raking up last years leaves.  Starting to see some green in my brown grass finally.  Spring is emerging!  I think it's absolutely miraculous that I can say that already, when so many of my Northern friends are snowed in. . . .  Sorry, guys!  I am thinking warm and wonderful thoughts of you all, if that helps in the least bit.  I'm hoping that you all will be thinking cooling thoughts of me come June and July when your weather is beautiful and mine is scorching!!!  As for diet and exercise, my Special K Challenge is still ongoing... and the yard work speaks for itself with the exercise portion of my self-renewal.  Although yard work is a natural way to exercise, I still need to add some "formal" cardio to that, to get my metabolism racing.  I must admit, today I actually woke up at 8:30 am fully intending on popping in my Jillian Michaels DVD.  Alas, I went back to sleep instead.  In this case, I'm reminded of the "road to ... is filled with good intentions."  So, I admonish myself and resolve to get up earlier tomorrow.  'Til then, here is some pretty color for you Northerners.... (my Ipheon bulbs, when they are in full bloom)

Just when you think that part is over with....

Why is it when I'm doing good, the person who brought me down the most decides to burst my bubble??  What part of "NEVER CALL ME AGAIN" is unclear?  I didn't leave any doubt in that sentence whatsoever.  No, "well, you know maybe someday..."  No!  I said, plain as day, "NEVER CALL ME AGAIN".  My mood was improving.  I'm losing weight, inches even!  I am getting back to being my old self and then BAMMM, there he is.  Very proud of myself though, that I did not talk to him.  I just reminded him, AGAIN, that he is not to call me.  I am either going to have to change my phone number or invest in a phone with caller ID.  Ok, well.... back on track tomorrow.  Can't let this get me down.  Head is spinning, kind of at a loss for words so.....

'Til tomorrow...

Like a butterfly from a cocoon:

I have shed another 2 lbs of this person who is not me.  Literally, I feel like I am trapped inside another person! But I'm slowly emerging, day by day.  My good attitude is coming back, as well as my bubbly personality.  I'm beginning to love live again, as I once had.  It's a little overcast outside today, but I'm going to get out there anyways because it's still 72 degrees.  I'm not going to let a few clouds ruin my day!!  If it starts to rain, I'll just thank God for the water for my plants and come inside to clean my house (which needs done anyways.).  Hopefully, I'm getting a visitor soon.  One of my dear friends from Michigan who I miss tremendously. Even though I'm doing good with the weight loss, I'm not going to leave it to chance and so I'm going back on my Special K challenge at www.specialk.com/challenge/ because I lost 8 lbs. in two weeks doing that!  If you try to click on the link and it doesn't work, type the address into your search bar because this is the correct link.

Reflecting today.....

I've been thinking back on my life and the things I regret.  Decisions I've made that I regret and such.  I want to say that I wish I could go back in time and start over, but at which point, and which bad decision, would I change?  Because I used to wish I could go back to when I was 17 and change THAT decision, but then I wouldn't have my sons.  Besides, I did end up having a do-over on that one and !WOW! that "what if?" ended up being a "what the hell was I thinking?" and taught me that what I thought was a bad decision was actually the right one... so, the best thing I can say is that all my decisions (whether good or bad) led me to where I am right now and that everything happens for a reason.  I'm not supposed to question God's Plan for me anyways, just learn from my mistakes along the way, and do my best not to repeat them or make any more.  I am human, though, so I will end up making more mistakes (God, keep helping me!) to learn from.

Well, I'm gonna go outside and work on my flower beds.  For all of you that are stuck in the snow all over most of the United States, here is something to make you think warm thoughts......

Listening to music and dancing... YES ALL BY MYSELF... in my kitchen

I am LOVING my new attitude.  Every day I'm feeling more and more like my old self.  I've only lost like 8 lbs. since starting this, but I've lost a TON of old baggage so I feel loads lighter.  So, in reality, I've lost 130 lbs.  At least that's what he claims he weighed, but I'm saying it's more like 120 (he was a little guy... in every way!!!!) It's another beautiful day outside here in sunny Florida, so I will be going outside to plant some Nicotiana, some mixed Canna seeds, some Lemon Queen sunflower seeds, Mexican Bird of Paradise, some Hollyhocks and some Morning Glories.  I have to get on the 'net and look up how tall all of them get first so I know where I want to plant them.  Except the morning glories, I know just where those are going.... right around the base of the one and only tree in my yard because they will climb clear to the top.  The hummingbirds love that. Can't wait to get my feeders out in a couple of days.  So, I'm loving this new site that my son (thanks, Raymond) found for me to pull music off of...  BearShare....  awesome site, free but LEGAL.  You should check it out if you enjoy music like I do.  Well, all, have a great day and I will be back later!!!

This SO describes how I feel....

"When it's good, then it's good...
it's so good, until it goes bad...
Til you try to find the you that you once had.
I've heard myself say "never again",
Broken down in agony,
just trying to find a friend."
                      Pink... from the song "Sober"

My idea of a perfect day...

Well, that was just wonderful.  I worked out in the yard most of the day.  Played on the computer a little bit.  Chatted with an old friend who I miss dearly.  I got my Hibiscus planted, and she is happy about that. (I refer to all of my flowering plants as "her"...  my cacti and trees are "him"... one of my many quirks).  Nothing like a hard days work in the yard to tone up the muscles naturally!  I love it!  And, soon, I'll be rewarded by the beauty of color in my yard.  Next week, I'm putting out the bird feeders.  Usually leave them up year round, but I moved so many times this year that I didn't bother putting them out at the last place (knew I wouldn't be there long... it was the ex's place, and HE'S the reason I moved so many times this year.  Oh well, live and learn)...  Anywho.... loving my yard and loving that I'm feeling "me" returning!
Now, I'm gonna crank up MY music (now that I'm not bound by what someone else wanted to listen to...), read my Sunday paper and cut my coupons out!!!  Yep, she (meaning, me) is coming back!!!

'Til tomorrow, enjoy this photo of some of the Crocus bulbs I have planted and that are starting to come up already (the pic shows them last year in full bloom)....

What a beautiful day....

Well, it is just gorgeous outside today.  One of the reasons I moved from Michigan to Florida was to escape the cold weather.  Today, with it being sunny and 72 degrees in January, is proof that I did the right thing!  My day is going to be full of something that I love.... yard work and gardening!!!  Have to prepare the ground, as we are able to start planting certain vegetables and flowers around mid to late February around here.  I usually start everything indoors until mid March though.  All that yard work will have my muscles feeling good later, and even better tomorrow!  Have decided for sure, due to late night infomercials, to try out Zumba fitness.  I'm going to order the DVD series off www.Zumba.com.  I am so excited about the day today... I can't wait to get out in my yard!!  I'll post more later.

Til then....

A little inspiration/reward for myself....

Today has been a good day.  I went for a walk to make myself get out of the house.  I bought myself this little inspirational gift (see photo). It's both an inspiration and a little reward for going for a walk by myself.  Usually, I would make my son go with me so I don't get anxious, but he's not here anymore and I have to rely on myself. If I'm to locate the real me inside of this person I've become, I need to draw upon the strength and confidence I once had, that I know is still in there somewhere....

It says:  Dance as if no one is watching
             Sing as if no one is listening
             Live each day as if it were your last

Isn't that pretty?  Of course, I don't know that I'd do that last one.  There are two people in particular that I would REALLY like to get even with and if I knew today were my last day, oh boy could I do some damage.......

Maybe I should have said "one DAY at a time"....

*Big sigh*....  ok, now what?  I'm so used to doing the same old thing everyday and not enjoying myself that I don't know where to start first.  I guess I should start by cleaning up all the old clutter to make room for the sparling new everything, including me.  Alright, even that task sounds daunting...  How about just one room at a time, one step at a time?  Yeah, that I can do.  Got invited to a parade today.  Almost went too, then panicked.  I'm not ready for that outside world just yet...  Oh, GOOD NEWS:  finally got the ex to back off.  He called after being told NEVER to call again so I kept posting on his facebook until he finally messaged at me to leave him the "F" (not saying the word he used) alone!  YES!!! NOW we're on the same page!  I was hoping he'd start to feel that way because it costs money to change a phone number and he's not worth another dime of mine! (and no, I don't have caller ID).  Okay, *another sigh*, more coffee and then cranking the music and getting at this business of living and evolving (or is it "re-evolving since I'm going back to me and not forward to something else?? point to ponder...)  Until later.....

All is well....

So my son got to Tampa ok and he's settling in.  Now I can relax and quit worrying.  I'm going to go to sleep, but I'm leaving you with some pics of my sons.  Til tomorrow then....

This is Raymond, my oldest

Clayton (on the left) in the USMC

To cry or not to cry...

Well, there he goes...  My son has just pulled away from the curb, on his way to his new adventures in this journey we call "Life".  I am holding back tears because I will miss him, and yet I am anxious to get on with my own living.  I know that God is telling me "Your children are grown, but you are still young."  Tomorrow, I begin the task of getting myself back together.  Tonight, I think I'll look at some pictures of my boys....

An afterthought....

Love to pass along this information to you...  Some great recipes and healthy tips:

http://lacrossefitnessfestival.com/newsletter/Docs/jan_FestFoods.pdf

Hello, It's Me....

It's 2011... and the first day of the beginning of the rest of my life.  My son leaves for his new job today.  I'll be alone, with my thoughts, for the very first time in 22 years.  A little scary, but definitely exciting!  I have thought a lot lately about how things have gone for me for the past ten years.  I don't like it.  I am no longer me.  I have changed to become what others around me want me to be.  And with each change, slowly, I have lost the real me.  I'll bet none of these people know that I love to sew and make quilts, I love to crochet and knit, some of them know that I love to garden...  No, what they know of me is that I party with the best of them, hate mornings, can be really grouchy, and will give generously to a fault.  I'm 5'0" and I weigh 167 lbs.  That is what this lifestyle has done to me.  At my best, I'm (still) 5'0" but I only weigh 105 lbs.  Ok, that was at age 17, but even after having both of my babies, I got back down to 122 lbs. and I WAS HAPPY!  Even weight not withstanding, back then I laughed, cried, smiled, slept, loved and trusted.  Now, I do none of that.  I don't show my emotions to anybody because every time that I have in the past 10 years, somehow they've used it against me or taken advantage of me in one way or another.  So now I rarely go out, I never let anyone in and I don't trust anyone... not even myself.  Why not myself?  Because it was my own bad decision making that got me where I am right now.  So, I plan to take this year and get back to being me!  The person who loves all things nature, and all things creative.  I may even learn how to paint with water-colors and oils this year.  I'm definitely going to visit my old friends...  the ones who I always knew I could trust.  I'm going to get back to my exercising that I used to LOVE... thinking about trying that new Zumba craze (I hear good things about it).  Join me on my journey (we'll take it one step at a time together) ......